The Day That Could Never Be
by BadgerWolf
Summary: It could have been the happiest day of Randall and Sulley's lives. It should have been. But it wasn't. And it never could be. Sulley reflects on exactly what happened to prevent it, and what kind of monster he really is. WARNING: Death is mentioned in detail. Please do not read if this affects you.


**WARNING: There is a... fairly graphic description of a dead body within this story. If this would somehow impact you negatively, I would advise you not to read.**

******Disclaimer: Monsters Inc., Monsters University and all characters herein belong to Walt Disney Pictures and Pixar Animation Studios.**

**A/N: So, this was brought on by an OTP prompt on tumblr. I found the idea both interesting and tragic, and honestly I just had to try it! So... here it is! I hope you enjoy.**

* * *

As far as wedding turnouts went, it was a pretty spectacular crowd to behold. Sulley and Randall's big day had a lot of big-name monsters fill the front-most seats, behind the family of course. Johnny Worthington III, Roy O'Growlahan, Brock Pearson, Claire Wheeler, Carrie Williams and Naomi Jackson to name but a few. Since college each one of them had made a name for themselves, whether in Scaring or other careers, and their attendance only further perpetuated the celebrity status of the event. Even Dean Abigail Hardscrabble and Professor Derek Knight, as well as other various MU faculty, had graced the day with their presence.

But of course, they were not the main focus of the day. No, the focus was on the monsters at the forefront of the church, standing upon the altar. A whole series of arguments had led to not one, but two maids of honour and two best men. Mike and Fungus both stood on one side, dressed sharply in a suit which adequately fit their unique builds much to everyone's surprise, particularly in regards to Mike. Celia and Randall's mother stood on the other, dressed in bridesmaid dresses of the purest white which had earned both of them more than a few appreciative smiles and glances, much to both Mike and Randall's chagrin.

And there, stood in the centre of the altar, as everyone might have expected, were the two grooms themselves. It was the one and only time anyone could ever remember Sulley wearing a suit, and everyone in attendance would say it made him look good. Better than good, it was the best he'd ever looked. His suit was perfectly contoured to his frame, his shoes were large enough to be comfortable without detracting from the sophistication of their style, his fur was groomed immaculately, something even Johnny couldn't help be a little envious of, and he'd even opted to sport the cowlick he had back in college, though Randall had more to do with that decision than he had.

Randall himself had his own suit tailored to his body shape, the shirt and jacket fitting both sets of his arms and the pants suitably fitting both sets of legs, giving ample room for manoeuvrability and leaving just enough of his tail unclothed without being too much. He'd opted for a bow tie, something both Sulley and Mike had mocked him for at first until they realised quite how well it suited him.

But the clothes didn't matter to either of them, rather the monster wearing them were the object of Sulley and Randall's eyes at that moment. The procession had gone well so far, everyone having watched in anticipation, and now the time had come. The two were to exchange vows and give each other the rings they had so painstakingly fussed over to make sure they were the perfect complement to their love for each other.

"And now we shall hear the vows both monsters have prepared for each other," the priest announced.

It had been arranged that Sulley would be first. He reached into his pocket, pulled out a note and opened it up, looking down to give it a quick skim before reading it aloud. But despite the amount of time he'd spent pouring his heart into the words, they didn't seem enough. With a heavy sigh, he looked up, smiled at his fiancé and calmly tore up the note. He was rewarded with a questioning gaze, and as Randall was about to protest, the large blue-furred monster raised a finger to Randall's lips.

"Our love…" he began, pausing to give his speech quick thought. "Our love, our relationship, has never been perfect. It was awkward, complicated, strange… It couldn't possibly have been prepared for, and I suppose in a way, my vows shouldn't be either. So I'll just speak from the heart." He flashed a quick, wide smile, one which Randall returned, before taking a deep breath and continuing. "Randall. You are the most complicated, painfully annoying, _infuriating_ monster I have ever met. Until not long ago every interaction we had was unpleasant, hurtful, just plain bad."

Every monster in attendance, Randall included, winced at the words. They had no idea where this was going, but couldn't bring themselves to interrupt, both out of curiosity and a sense of it not being their place to.

"And I couldn't be happier with that."

Randall blinked a couple of times, the confusion evident on his face. Still he didn't utter a word, allowing Sulley to continue.

"Because, you see Randall, you presented me a challenge. A challenge to step outside of my comfort zone, to interact with someone unlike anyone I ever had before, someone _so_ different from myself, yet so similar. And I think that might have been why you pushed me away, why I felt so uncomfortable to be around you. We both knew how much we had in common, and for _whatever reason_ we didn't like it. Not at first." Sulley cleared his throat, as much to pause for thought as it was to actually correct his faltering voice. "But then we got to know each other. A lot of stuff happened to get us to that point…" he said, hinting at the incident with the Scream Extractor but not specifically referring to it, "but we got there. We began talking. Opening up to each other. Learning. And the more we spoke, the more we wanted to speak." He shuffled his feet slightly, scratching the back of his head. "In the past couple of years I've seen you change from a monster who acted bitterly to everyone to keep them at arm's length, to a monster who accepts others with open arms, who is easy to get along with, who enriches everyone's lives just by being there. Now, a lot of people might say I made you a better monster, but that's not true. I might have helped bring it out in you, but you were always that monster deep down. No, it was you who made _me_ a better monster."

Sulley paused again for a moment, letting those words sink in for everyone gathered before continuing. "You see, I… I had my faults. A _lot_ of faults. My biggest one perhaps was never being my own monster. I was always someone who was looking to be led, to be told what to do. I couldn't even remember the last time I had a real, independent thought with what I wanted out of life. Not until you taught me how to again." He took hold of Randall's hands at this point, flashing yet another of his winning smiles, one which melted Randall's heart every time he saw it. "You might not have realised it, but you helped me more than anyone could possibly imagine. Because of you, I knew where I wanted my career to go. Because of you, I knew what I wanted out of life. And because of you, I am where I am now. Standing face to face with the one monster I know will always love me unconditionally, and one I am lucky enough to be able to love unconditionally too. Sure, we have our arguments, every relationship does, but now that you're in my life I couldn't possibly imagine a day without you. You are the one constant in my life. The one who will always be there for me, to help me with any problem big or small, to make me feel wanted, appreciated and loved. And I stand before you today, promising you the exact same thing. To love you, to support you. I will be your pillar of strength, the one to be there when times are both good and bad, to be the one who will never leave you no matter what. Just as you are for me. _That_ is my promise." And with that, he slid the ring onto Randall's finger, never breaking eye contact as he smiled lovingly at his soon-to-be husband.

Not a single sound could be heard in the entire room for a moment until a couple of monsters let out a sniffle. Sulley looked lovingly into Randall's eyes, hoping to see approval. He thought he'd done his love justice, but he couldn't be sure. That was until he noticed a couple of tears escaping the reptilian monster's eyes and a wide smile slowly spreading across his face.

"Wow…" Randall gasped, choking back a sob of his own. "I uhh… just, wow."

Sulley chuckled, giving Randall's hands a small squeeze. "Nailed it?" he asked with a slightly amused smirk.

Randall simply nodded. He then realised it was his turn and so, gaining his composure slightly, he pulled out his own note from his pocket.

"Well, uhh… you kinda screwed this up for me," he chuckled, tearing up his own note.

A few chuckles could be heard in the room, one of which was from Sulley himself. "Sorry," he offered, though his smile didn't quite prove the sincerity in the apology.

"Uh-huh," Randall said, rolling his eyes. "OK, let's see… James. We've been through a _lot_ of shit."

A collective gasp echoed around the church, although most monsters then proceeded to laugh, expecting the kind of language from Randall.

"Well we have!" Randall said, turning to the crowd for a moment, earning a few more laughs. He then turned back to Sulley and gripped his hands a little tighter. "Now, like you said, I wasn't exactly the easiest monster to get along with at first. Yeah, I know, understatement of the year but shush, just listen." Although smirking, Sulley nodded, signalling he would stay quiet. "See, I don't know where this whole 'you didn't make me a better monster' crap is coming from, because it's not true. Sure, I suppose once I was a nicer monster, but that guy was buried long ago. It was _you_ who unearthed him, so really, give yourself some credit! I went from being a bitter, angry, caffeinated, sleep-deprived, work-orientated social outcast to being one of the most well-liked monsters around. And it was all down to you. You forgave me for some… pretty unforgivable things," he sighed, looking down for a moment. A small squeeze of his hands snapped him out of it and he looked up again, his eyes again locking on to his fiancé's. "But because of that… I'm still here, and all the better for it! And for once in my life I can say I'm really, truly happy. Because I have a friend, a _best_ friend, who's never going to leave me. One I can say I have more than a few… added benefits with, shall we say," he smirked.

A chorus of laughter again erupted throughout the room, though whether it was more from Randall's joke or Sulley's visible blush could be debated.

"But at the heart of it, all I can say is thank you, James. Thank you for everything you've done, and everything I'm sure you'll continue to do. I love you so much," he said as he slid the ring onto Sulley's finger. "And I always will."

Sulley smiled wide, tears of his own now falling as the two gazed lovingly upon each other. Almost every monster in attendance could be seen crying, blowing their nose or otherwise becoming emotional. Even the priest had to quickly wipe his eyes before continuing.

"And with the exchange of rings now done, by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss."

The two monsters drew near, their smiles only widening. This was it, their first kiss as a married couple, and they were both determined to make it their best. Leaning closer and closer, they became slightly apprehensive as they closed their eyes. Time seemed to slow as everything felt as though it hinged on this one action, even if it didn't really. Sulley's heart raced as he could practically feel Randall's lips upon his, but he then noticed something strange. The hands held in his own were decidedly absent all of a sudden. He opened his eyes and nothing around him seemed the same.

Tall, grand walls of oak had been replaced with smaller ones of an almost sterile white. Large stained glass windows of various colours had been replaced with a solitary window with a purple curtain across it. His suit was gone, the crowd was gone, and he had somehow been brought to his bed. But most importantly, right there next to him stood no-one. Randall was not there. And he never would be.

For just the briefest of moments Sulley considered the possibility that he was dreaming, only to realise that he had already been dreaming and this was his reality. A reality not of love and fulfilment, but of loneliness and regret. Randall was not his husband, nor his fiancé. He was not a lover, a friend, an acquaintance even. Randall was simply a monster he once knew from work before Sulley had sent him to his death.

Covering his face Sulley began to sob openly, howling in pain at the memories. Within an instant the light was flicked on and he felt a small, comforting pair of arms wrap around his midsection.

"You had the dream again?" Mike asked.

"Y-Yeah…" Sulley choked between sobs, wrapping his arms tight around his friend.

"Hey, shh… don't… don't cry…"

"But… but I…"

"C'mon Sul, you can't keep doing this to yourself. It's been two years!"

"Feels like… just yesterday…"

Mike just held Sulley closer. "I know Sul."

"S'all my fault."

"It's no-one's fault. No-one could've known. You were just protecting Boo, remember?"

"Y-Yeah…" he said, calming down slightly as he let Mike go.

"There, you see? It was just… unfortunate, that's all. No-one's to blame. It just happened."

"I guess so…"

Mike gave his friend one last hug before walking back to the door. He knew he hadn't done much to console his friend, but there was really nothing he could do that he hadn't already tried. He sighed and turned back to Sulley, smiling weakly.

"Sleep easy, Sul. You'll feel better in the morning, I guarantee it."

"Thanks Mike," Sulley said, forcing his best smile to reassure him.

"No problem."

With that Mike flicked the light back off and closed the door behind him. Sulley was once again left alone in the dark with his thoughts.

Sulley had never confessed to Mike, or anyone else for that matter, his love for Randall. It had taken him long enough to realise it himself. It was too late by that point, of course. But nothing could be done to change that. It didn't stop Sulley asking himself 'what if?' every so often, however. Even his dreams had begun torturing him with that question.

He could only hope that, as he closed his eyes to drift off to sleep once more, it wouldn't happen again for a while.

* * *

"I dreamt of you again last night."

Sulley stood dumbly with a flimsy-looking bunch of flowers gripped in one hand, though the tightness of his grip was probably a contributing factor to the bouquet's flimsiness. He knelt in front of the grave, arranging the flowers as nicely as he could in one of the pots before sitting upon the ground, looking intently at the headstone.

"I know you're probably looking down on me, cursing me blind for what I did, how stupid I am… Heck, I wouldn't be surprised if all my visits just bug you. But I can't help it. I like to talk to you. I always did, whenever you would let me." He chuckled weakly. "Heh, I suppose you can't really stop me now."

He sat silently for a moment, allowing a breeze to roll over him as he organised his thoughts, planning what he wanted to say next.

"I had that same dream again, y'know? The one where we've accepted our differences, gone through the motions, even gotten to the point of marriage! We read each other our vows this time though. Yours were beautiful…"

Sulley choked back a sob, a tear rolling down his cheek. "'Course, I guess they were just my words. Made up in my head, probably just everything I wanted to hear or something…"

He began fidgeting with his hands, looking anywhere but at the grave. "I, uhh… I liked your suit. You were very handsome. Even in the bowtie. And you should've seen your mom! And your sister! And little Rex… You'd have been proud."

Sulley began tearing up again as he fell silent for a moment longer, turning back to the headstone. "It wouldn't have happened though, would it? I might love you, but you'd have never loved a… a _monster_ like me. Not after what I did… I don't blame you though, I'd hate me too. I do hate me, actually. But, well… that's no good for anyone I guess. I dunno…"

He gazed at the headstone a little longer, desperately trying to think of something else to fill the silence. "Y'know, Mike said something pretty funny the other day. It was at work, I was on the laugh floor. See, I usually don't get involved in the actual amusing part of the business, but he convinced me to team up with him for this one kid… It didn't go well. Not at all. Well, actually, I guess you could say it went _really_ well. I made a complete fool of myself! Messed everything up and almost broke my arm. Made the kid laugh more than I've ever known a kid to. Made Mike laugh too. And Mike said that it probably would've made you laugh as well. See, I found it funny 'cause it's true, you would've laughed. I know you didn't really do that often, but hey, I looked like an idiot! You'd have found it funny, trust me on that."

He shuffled slightly closer to the headstone, but again looked down, struggling to keep the 'conversation' going. "Hey, you think maybe if we were friends in college things could've been different? I kinda wonder about that sometimes… Could we even have been friends if we actually talked to each other back then? What do you think?" He stared at the stone, not expecting an answer, but almost wishing he would get one. "Nah, it probably wouldn't have happened like that back then either. I was a jerk. Still am, I suppose…"

Sulley shook his head. "Sorry, making this all about me… This should be about you. After all, it's been two years now." He reached a hand out, trailing a claw along the second date listed, the official date of Randall's death. Of course, it could have been anything up to months earlier, no-one really knew, it was simply the date his body had been discovered.

Images flashed through Sulley's mind of that day. After months of searching they had finally found the general location of the door they had banished Randall through and smashed. Hoping he hadn't ever strayed too far, a search party was sent to look for him. Upon Sulley's own insistence, he, Mike and Fungus were allowed to join the CDA agents in their hunt for the reptilian monster.

Sulley had been the first to find the body. It was almost completely unrecognisable as the monster he'd thrown through the door. Randall was broken and bloody, several limbs were severely out of place, chunks of flesh were missing where he'd presumably been feasted on by the local fauna, his scales were no longer a vibrant purple but almost grey in colour, and the smell… That awful smell…

He vomited. Sulley was ashamed to admit it, but the first thing his body could think to do upon the discovery was expel the contents of his stomach. Violently. It may have been the smell, it may have been the sight of the mangled body, or it may have been the sudden realisation of the consequences of his actions. Sulley had killed a monster. Maybe not directly, but his actions had led to a co-worker's death.

He would never forgive himself. Less so when, upon reflection, he realised that he had fallen in love with the monster long ago. The love of his life, dead by his own two hands.

Sulley couldn't think of it anymore. It hurt too much. But he couldn't stop thinking about it either. Two years on and not a single day went by that he remembered the discovery and blamed himself for it.

He broke down once again. His sobs were all that could be heard in the graveyard beyond the odd chirping of a nearby bird. He knelt up in an attempt to stand only to collapse forward, clutching to the headstone as his tears began to soak it.

"Randall… I'm… I'm so sorry… I didn't… didn't mean to… Please… Please come back to me… Please don't be dead… Please… just… just come back…"

Sulley's sobs continued on unheard for a while. He couldn't bring himself to leave, not just yet. He didn't want to leave Randall alone, he knew how it felt and didn't wish it on him, dead or alive.

"Please… just come back… Randy…"

He knew no amount of pleading would bring him back; no amount of crying would make him feel better. Nothing could make this alright. He knew the grief would haunt him for the rest of his life. He only prayed that once it came to an end, forgiveness would be what awaited him.


End file.
